March 24, 2009 at 2:30 pm (Uncategorized)

we were on the edge of the water, you and i. me in my little black dress, you in that white shirt.
it’s a starry night, it’s windy, it’s perfect.
you gently trace the bracelets on my wrists, ask me why i wear them. no one else has done this. i wouldn’t explain to anyone else anyways.
suddenly, you stand up and start to walk away. i remain seated, staring at the water.
“aren’t you going to follow me?”
“not anymore.”
you fade away, and i’m left alone.
and then i wake up, tangled in my sheets. it’s 5 a.m., and i don’t know how i feel.
i sit on the balcony, head in my hands, heart in my mouth.
it’s been so long since i’ve dreamt of you. and never once, never have i not followed you.
so what does this mean?
am i finally over you? can i ever be over you?
i inhale slowly; my panic attacks are more frequent these days. i grip my phone tightly, and almost drop it when it buzzes.
‘hey, i know you’re probably asleep right now. but i miss you. call me.’
he’s not you, not by far. but it’s enough to calm me down. i climb back to bed, and turn your picture around. i don’t need any more reminders of you.
i do my 5 minutes before i sleep thing, only difference is that you’re not whom i’m thinking off.
and then i’m gone, and so are you.

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1 Comment

  1. Gin said,

    U_U huggles

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