August 29, 2009 at 4:28 pm (personal)

soooooo, its been a pretty banal week. i have…slouched around. yeah, that’s the only thing i really remember doing. mercifully, i am not one of those people who have to constantly be active and productive. i am actually okay with being indolent. i can live with myself.


oh, sorry. did you not see that coming?

i think i’ve kinda always wanted to be a wizard, a good one, duh. i first started reading harry potter when i was 11, and i still remember how i’d wave a ruler around, yelling nonsense spells.
many a death eater (barbie dolls) did i kill, along with my trusty wizard friends (various soft toys) occasionally, i’d coverse with muggles (mum/neighbours)

i don’t think i’ll ever outgrow harry potter, and i’m pretty sure that a small part of me will always want to be a wizard.


i’ve also wanted to be a pirate in the past.
i cannot justify this, nor can i remember why i got stuck on this in the first place. but, i know for a fact that i did want to be a pirate, with a parrot, and to have a battle with a hot enemy pirate, only to fall madly in love with each other and together, conquer the seven seas.

basically, i wanted a mr. and mrs. smith storyline, but in pirate garb and pirate talk.

first off, let me address the fact that this picture is highly unattractive. yes, i know, thank you. but i’ve been fiddling with this one for something like half an hour, and i cannot get it right (giant twss right there). also, do remember that i am indolent. and what that actually means is that, i don’t care.
so, ok, superhero. everyone’s wanted to be a superhero, even me. i didn’t necessarily want to be superman, cause i always thought he was a pansy (i blame smallville for this perception), instead, i wanted to be…INVISIBLE GIRL (yeah, i know, i know, soooooo creative) but you see, what made me different is that i wanted to be INVISIBLE GIRL with magic powers, not unlike those possessed by the sisters from charmed. that means my powers would include: invisibility, telepathy, freezing time, predicting the future and teleportation.
i would be so kick ass.
also, my superhero saga would include me dating a whitelighter, because you know, why let the fantasy stop at powers?

ok, so why am i bringing these highly impossible dreams up? honestly, i didn’t intend to. i was going to blog about conversations i’ve been having all week, but i think i needed this post more.

a-levels is tough shit. what with studying for all the subjects, doing my sats/sats2, university applications, scholarship applications, and afs work, i find myself having constant moment of disillusionment. 
also, i am scared.
there is so much i want to acheive; real stuff, as in actually possible dreams, and sometimes, i am terrified that somehow, i am going to mess it up.
so today, for the fifteen minutes it took to type this out, i am reminding myself about the kid who believed she could be anything – be it wizard, pirate, or superhero. i am reminding myself to never lose that spirit, to never give up, and most importantly, to never give in.

strange how much wiser an 11 year old is than a 19 year old.


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August 26, 2009 at 6:44 am (Uncategorized)

i am hungry.

rolled out of bed somewhere around noon today, talked to hannah, watched tv, laughed at  some posts on, and rolled back into bed.
lazy? yes
unproductive? yes
regrettable? nope.
i have spent the past 2 weeks of holidays doing things; uni applications, afs camp, math, bio, literature.
of course there were also the fun stuff like mtv world stage, malacca trip, countless yum cha sessions and the like, but never was there a day where i did absolutely nothing.

and so i decided that today is that day. i’m going over my planner, and i realised that never again will an opportunity for a day like this come up again – not anytime soon.

so today, i will revel in laziness, and non-productivity. i will reread good books, and watch stupid shows. i i will chug snapple and spend a majority of my time wrapped in a comfy blanket.

my day is going to be awesome.

and i think that’s the mcdonalds delivery guy at the gate. toodles!

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August 24, 2009 at 5:45 pm (holidays)

Prettiest Sky Ever
the weather was so amazing today. complete fairytale weather, with crayon blue sky and cartoon like clouds.
i resisted the urge to nap, and instead, worked on uni applications and the afs camp.
every once in a while, i’d step out into the sunshine, while sipping some coffee and trace shapes in the clouds.
i spotted a snake, a shoe, what looked like half the body of a cat (the half with the tail) and a golf club.

very calm, compared to some of the crazy things that’s happened lately.

andddddd, my room is haunted. but that’s a story for another day. maybe tomorrow, when i’m in a chattier mood.

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August 22, 2009 at 1:00 pm (personal)

lost and insecure, you found me, you found me
lying on the floor surrounded, surrounded
why’d you have to wait? where were you? where were you?
just a little late, you found me, you found me.

this could be our story, and i’d like to pretend i don’t care, but i do. i wish you’d care half as much as i do, because if you did, you’d be right here, and this was post wouldn’t be necessary.
i don’t really know what im hoping for, sitting here, typing this. it’s not going to bring you back, it’s not going to open your eyes and it sure as hell isn’t going to make me feel better.
you’ve made your choice, and i’d like to pretend i made mine, even though we both know that i really didn’t have a choice here, did i?

where are you?
no, really, where? not as in physically, but…you. you you. the you i knew, the you i loved, the you i would have done almost anything for.
(note the past tense)
where are you?

i tell everyone who asks that it doesn’t matter, that i don’t really care. who am i trying to fool? i never stopped caring, and that’s what really sucks, because somewhere along the way, you obviously did.
and i don’t know why.

so, i guess what i’m really trying to say, what this entire post is really about, is that…i miss you.
i really really really miss you. italics don’t lie.

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August 21, 2009 at 5:16 pm (books, dog, music)

i don’t think i’ll be getting any sleep tonight. reason? i just stumbled onto the greatest website in a while.  click click click for endless giggles!

it’s like fmylife, but way better. i promise you that you will not regret it. my favourite one so far:
Today, my teacher asked my class to raise their hand if they were lazy. I was the only one who didn’t raise their hand. When asked why, I said I was too lazy. He laughed and gave me extra credit. I have a newly found respect for him. MLIA

sooooo, yes. i am sitting here, going through the archives of this awesome site, while having a eminem-a-thon. yes, i do like eminem. a whole lot, actually. i mean, his prevalent vulgarity aside, the man’s rapping is genius. and funny. at least, i find it funny. i think my favourite rap by him is either ‘lose yourself’ or…no, it’s ‘lose yourself’ for sure.

i have spent my entire (and you think when i say entire, i’m exaggerating, but no, really. i mean entire) day reading king dork. it’s such a good book! good books make me so happy. speaking of good books, there will be a bookfest from tomorrow onwards at the kl convention centre. be excited. i know i am.

today on facebook, someone left a completely inane comment on a wall post of mine. it made no sense, and it still doesn’t, but i refuse to reply because my replying might lead to furthur exchanges with said person. and i don’t want that. yeah, yeah, i’m mean. whatever.

keeping my fingers crossed for tomorrrow!

sorry, completely pointless post. have a picture as an apology.

Picture 017
isn’t he adorable?


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August 20, 2009 at 3:36 pm (friends, personal)

i should blog about our awesome malacca trip, but i’m so tired. and also, everyone else has the pictures. (i know, i know. that excuse is getting old. i should just go ahead and get myself a new camera. noted)

so, i came home, and i was so full of nervous energy, i cleaned out my drawers – all 6 of them. and while doing that, i found a hardcover brown book with roses traced out all over the cover, and golden pages.

my oregon diary.
how could i have forgotten all about it?

so, yes, i was flipping through it, and i got all the way to the last entry. and for some inane reason, i feel like sharing part of it here. this isn’t prompted by anything. i just want to.

one thing about being an exchange student – you lose all sense of time. on the plane heading to washington dc now. i hate this part. it’s like the beginning of the end, and i just want it to end already. i’m so sick of goodbyes, and i don’t want anymore hellos.’

why am i posting this?

i don’t know. it just felt right.

OH. have you met my talented friend? i meant to do this ages ago but ehhh, i forgot.

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August 18, 2009 at 1:31 pm (afs, music)

i had an almost 4 hour long meeting today about the  upcoming yes alumni camp…what holidays?
actually, i had a lot of fun. lots of things were accomplished, lots of excitement about whats going to happen. fingers crossed, this will be a kick ass camp.

oh, and i’m off to malacca with the high schoolies tomorrow.
because we can.
and to celebrate pig’s birthday.
i’m so excited! we even have an itenarary, just so you have an idea about how serious this trip is going to be. 
came home to the best surprise in my email inbox.

the pictures from our exclusive interview with boys like girls!

andddddddddddddd, my favouritest picture:


if i die tonight, i die happy i tell you.

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August 18, 2009 at 3:55 am (afs, beverages, books, photography)

if you haven’t read this book already,

please go ahead, and do. it’s a brilliant book. simple, yet powerful. then, watch the movie. it will break your heart, yes, but watch it. history terrifies me sometimes, because i always wonder if there’s really anything thats stopping us from doing it all over again.

last sunday was the afs alumni reunion at jalan maarof. did you know that yasmin yusof was an exchange student?
we also had yummy cupcakes.
6416_1204316994716_1432367965_30567333_5315176_nstolen from aleks the italian, who has bright blue shoes, which i am mesemerized by.
it was supposed to end at 8.30, but in typical afs fashion, we can never say goodbye,  so we all headed over to nirwana for banana leaf and milo and baskin robbins.


this is my new favourite top. and that is my all time favourite drink. and yes, i do have a nose piercing. i’ve had it since i was 17. how observant of all of you.

ok, must go now and try and squeeze in some king dork reading time before my afs meeting.

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August 16, 2009 at 5:31 pm (food, friends, holidays, music)

sooooo, how amazing was mtv world stage?



P1000405fooding at international pancake house, where neither of us ate pancakes. my kiasuness ensured that we had plenty of time to spare.

P1000408in line. we were extremo sneaky with the bag am quite proud we managed to pull it off.

they were not bad, neither were they awesome. they didn’t really do anything for the crowd, who by this time, was completely restless with all the waiting.

P1000465boys like girls. was. awesome. endofstory.

P1000478during ‘thunder’, i stopped snapping pictures, and along with everyone else, raised my arms and sang along. it was the most amazing feeling. and i have always loved that song. always. it brings back so many memories.

P1000483‘throw it away
 forget yesterday
 we’ll make the great escape
 we won’t hear a word they say
 they don’t know us anyway

i’m not putting up any pictures of raygun, because all the ones i have wouldn’t do them justice =(
they were brilliant, though. i totally did not see it coming. if you’ve seen their music video for ‘just because you can’, you’d think they were vaguely annoying musicians.
they are not.
they are entertaining, and talented. one of the few musicians that are better live. without a doubt, they were the best performance of the night.

P1000527hoobastank was not bad. actually, i’m even going to to go so far as to say that they were really, really good. doug was so awesomely cool; his face, his expressions. and then of course, they had the whole crowd singing the ghostbusters song, which i approve of, because acts of randomness like this make me happy.
when they launched into ‘the reason’, i remembered all the reasons i loved them. again, the songs has so many memories tied to it.

P1000581the rejects were brilliant. i don’t know how to better describe it.

P1000583tyson ritter has so much energy, it blows my mind. he kinda reminds me of a hyperactive monkey on crack, but you know, a cute one.
they sang ‘it ends tonight’ and i was completely contented. i LOVE that song. LOVE. LOVE LOVE LOVE. i’m going to stop saying love.

P1000603the crowd thinned considerably for kasabian, probably because they’re not very popular in malaysia (some people would beg to differ, but it’s true) those who stayed though, were pretty hardcore moshers.
i’m not overly familiar with them, but i do know and love ‘shoot the runner’, which they performed.

P1000616the crowd of purpotedly 15000.

quite frankly, i don’t know how we lasted. it’s one of those things you go through, and then you think back, and you wonder ‘holy hell. how?’ (alliteration!)

we were so dead by the end of it all, it wasn’t funny. 9 hours of standing, with roughly 5 hours of jumping around, screaming and dancing thrown in.

thank god for youth.

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August 13, 2009 at 3:19 am (beverages, food, friends, movies, music)

yesterday was amazing!
actually, this whole week has been pretty damn amazing. but yesterday. yesterday was mind blowing.

so i won a junk magazine competition which allowed me in to interview boys like girls in person.
i got to pyramid tower around 1.30 ish, and met with the two other winners. we were greeted by:

they were half naked a lot because there was a photo shoot coming up, and they were all trying to figure out what to wear. not that we were complaining of course.

so, yeah, the photoshoot, the one we didn’t know about, but ended up helping with. the people from junk asked, ‘do you guys mind helping out? just throw confetti and balloons at the boys.’ and with grins a mile long, we politely said ok, and then squealed when they walked away.
obviously, we couldn’t take our own pictures during the photoshoot, but junk’s released a couple of pictures via twitter already.

the boys were very cool during the photoshoot. they really got into the whole confetti/balloons/glitter/cake thing.

afters, we had our exclusive interview with them, and it was hilarious. there’s an exclusive picture with them from the interview, but i’m waiting on junk to send it to me.

afters, rushed to the curve so that we could do the whole pre-order thing at sony style.

P1000379we went prepared.

we waited in line forever. no, really. forever. partly because we wanted the cd. partly because we wanted the free mtv stage passes that came along with it. yes, i’m aware i already have tickets. i also have a plan =)
met cool people while in line. met some scary 15 year  olds. got out limited edition poster.
at 7.30, the boys appeared.
hello paul, alyssa’s new love.

seeing them for the third day in a row now.


P1000394dinner was yummy, as usual. 

last friday we had won tickets to watch district 9 today. we weren’t all that jazzed to be honest, because we aren’t huge fans of alien movies, but free is free, so we went.
it was awful, horrible, so bad that we walked out after 45 minutes, which is a first. for me anyways.
it wasn’t just uninteresting, it was also disgusting. i expected so much better from peter jackson.

to kill time, we sat on the steps in a light drizzle and talked about life.

it was so much better than sitting through the movie.

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